Talk:Albanian revolt of 1432–1436/GA1
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GA Review
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Reviewer: Peacemaker67 (talk · contribs) 12:15, 28 November 2012 (UTC) I'll be doing this review in the next couple of days.
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1. Well-written: | ||
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1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct. | There is a tendency throughout to introduce Turkish or Albanian terms without proper explanation, please go through and make sure all these are fixed. Also shorten lengthy sentences throughout, in particular, your use of the semi-colon is not justified. Once you've been through it yourself, I am happy to do a tidy up of the prose if necessary * Timar must be explained when it is introduced in the lead. * Suggest you re-write this sentence "Protracted sieges like that of Gjirokastër, capital of the sanjak, gave the Ottoman army time to assemble large forces from other parts of the empire and to subdue the main revolt, whose defeat was followed by massacres, by the end of 1436." It is segmented and would probably be better split into two sentences, one about the defeat and one about the massacres. * Suggest some simplification here "As Ottoman rule in the Balkans solidified, further attempts at centralization and moves to replace local timar holders with Ottoman landowners resumed." * Suggest wikilinking Cadastre from "cadastral survey" * Suggest "Gradually in the late 14th and early 15th century the Ottoman empire expanded into the region of modern-day Albania, defeated the local principalities and formed the Sanjak of Albania." * Not sure why you haven't used Timariot rather than spahis * "new taxes were altered", I assume you mean "imposed"? * you need to explain Avarız. * suggest you explain what proportion of average income these taxes represented, as mentioning the amounts without that information is almost pointless * you need to explain Devşirme * Sanjak needs to be consistently capitalised throughout * What were the Venetian territories that were under threat? Wikilink if possible as well. * A war galley? explain and wikilink * Subaşi must be explained and should be wikilinked * explain that Ibrahim of Karaman was in Anatolia * Explain that Sigismund was the Holy Roman Emperor * Shkodër is overlinked in the Aftermath section * wikilink Mehmed II * the use of status quo ante is unclear, I assume you mean they returned to the same policies of centralisation etc? |
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1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation. | A few of the above issues also relate to here |
2. Verifiable with no original research: | ||
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2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline. | Suggestion: use the language field in the references to indicate where they are not in English. |
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2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose). | |
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2c. it contains no original research. | |
3. Broad in its coverage: | ||
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3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic. | |
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3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style). | |
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4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each. | |
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5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. | |
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio: | ||
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6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content. | |
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6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. | * The caption for the pic of Sigismund should show HRE in full. |
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7. Overall assessment. |
- Ottoman terms were explained
- I used spahi instead of timariot as that would imply that the landowners were already timar holders (timariots) prior to the land distribution
- Ibrahim's location added, Venetian territories changed to Venetian territories in the region, to which the map acts supplementarily, while there are some relevant details on the aftermath section
- Instead of capitalising sanjak (province) I lowercased it as we wouldn't use the Province is located ... in English
- Wikilinked war galley, Mehmed II, cadastre and reduced Shkodër links
- Changed status quo ante to status quo ante bellum (yes, I was referring to the centralization policies)
- I don't know if there are any exact statistics on the annual income of Ottoman Albania in the early 15th century, but Under the previous taxation code, farmers were required to pay a tenth of their seasonal agricultural output, 1 ducat and 4 groshe (two-ninths of a ducat) to their lords. seems quite concise in terms of providing a better understanding regarding the tax system of the empire and specifically its treatment of Muslims and non-Muslims. The sea. agr. output of a farmer (the overwhelming majority of the population) would be ~12.2 ducats, but I don't know what part of that was "monetized" and what part remained "nonmonetary consumption capacity".--— ZjarriRrethues — talk 19:39, 29 November 2012 (UTC)
- Accept all that. I have made a few changes to the prose per above. Peacemaker67 (send... over) 23:06, 29 November 2012 (UTC)