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GA Review

[edit]

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Reviewer: QatarStarsLeague (talk · contribs) 20:24, 13 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I'll take this one. QatarStarsLeague (talk) 20:24, 13 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]


The redirect at the beginning can lose the capitalization on "right".


In the intro, the subjects such as philosophy and astronomy can be linked to.


Also, I might add his "unity of the intellect theory" to the intro.


We also might need a wikilink for "Neoplatonist"


"In the West...", comma after West.


I may be wrong, but I don't see the initial wikilinking of "Seville".


For the "Works" section, Averroes seems to have written on myriad topics beyond those mentioned in the section. Perhaps an "Other" subsection would address them?

  • The lead paragraph of the "Works" section already contains a brief survey of his works, and includes a link to List of works by Averroes. I think these should suffice to describe the breadth of Averroes' works. IMO, an "Others" subsection would probably just boringly list the fields and titles of Averroes' less known works, so it's not that helpful. HaEr48 (talk) 04:00, 29 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]


"Thoughts" may be too elegiac a title for the subsection; "Beliefs" or "Philosophy, or "Doctrines" would be more encyclopedic.


I think all of the scientific fields Averroes covered, i.e. astronomy, physics, could be encapsulated as subsections within a "Sciences" section.


There is no article for "material intellect", so perhaps a brief summary is in order.


Only the BBC source seems to be dead.


Excellent work with this very crucial article. QatarStarsLeague (talk) 04:46, 15 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]

@QatarStarsLeague: Thanks for your review. I'm currently traveling with very limited internet. May I ask for about 2 weeks before I address your review? HaEr48 (talk) 01:18, 17 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]
That's no problem. QatarStarsLeague (talk) 04:10, 17 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comments by a non-reviewer who had thoughts, both on the first paragraph:

"who wrote about many subjects including" Not positive, but shouldn't a comma follow "subjects"? Also, an MOS thing: are these all of the subjects he wrote on (i.e. an exhaustive list), because if it is exhaustive, a different word from including should be used. Given the length of the list, I would probably assume totality and use a different word even if it is merely probably exhaustive. But the comma is the thing that initially grabbed my attention.

  • Fixed the comma. Believe it or not, it's still non exhaustive (Averroes is a really prolific and wide-ranging thinker), so I believe "including" is the right word. HaEr48 (talk) 06:11, 28 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]

"numerous commentaries on Aristotle for which he was known" I think this is a run-on (comma should go after Aristotle).

I might see some other similar things, too. Hopefully this article isn't littered with them, not that it would be GA-sinking problem (such problems are easyy to fix). Compassionate727 (T·C) 03:01, 25 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'm reading above that English isn't your first language. That's perfectly fine, and indeed justifies some of the prose issues (having native speakers make large numbers of trivial grammatical errors raises competence questions; having non-native speakers make those same errors is perfectly normal and acceptable). It's good that you requested a copyedit from the guild, although it looks like they missed some things. Rather than posting them all here, would you like me to just fix them? Compassionate727 (T·C) 03:11, 25 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • And at this point I've made way too many comments in a row, as I'm wont to do late at night when medications have worn off. I'll try to force myself to log off after this. I just had one last thought: in the infobox, under Era, you place him as "medieval philosophy (Islamic Golden Age)". Medieval makes sense, as does Islamic Golden Age, and I would include both terms because they don't perfectly overlap. But I don't see why philsophy was included, given it isn't a time period. Was there a specific meaning that was meant to be communicated by this? Were you intending to wikilink to medieval philosophy rather than medieval era for a specific reason? Or is there something else I'm missing? Compassionate727 (T·C) 03:18, 25 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]
@QatarStarsLeague and Compassionate727:: Thanks for all the feedback. I've started working on some of them (see above). There's still more work, will get to it soon. I'll ping you when I'm done, and also please let me know if there are more feedback. HaEr48 (talk) 06:11, 28 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]
@QatarStarsLeague: I believe I have responded to all your comments above. Let me know if there's more I can do. HaEr48 (talk) 04:04, 29 June 2018 (UTC)[reply]