Talk:Cold Case Love/GA1
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[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Et3rnal (talk · contribs) 16:16, 16 June 2013 (UTC)
- 1 dead link needs to be addressed.
- The link is not dead, I don't know what is with the toolserver. You can check up on it. — Tomíca(T2ME) 17:42, 16 June 2013 (UTC)
- Lead
- "who labeled the song as a highlight and stand-out song on Rated R and additionally praised Rihanna's vocals" → "who labeled the song as a highlight on Rated R, additionally praising Rihanna's vocals." – 'highlight' and 'stand-out' together is a little redundant, sentence should also have a break.
- "Following the assault of Rihanna's boyfriend Chris Brown on her" → "Following Chris Brown's assault on Rihanna"
Done — Tomíca(T2ME) 17:42, 16 June 2013 (UTC)
- Composition and lyrical interpretation
- "no matter what song Rihanna released as the lead single from the record, it would immediately be looked at as a song about Brown." → "it would immediately be looked at as referring to Brown". – To avoid repetition of song.
- "should expect an edgier and angrier Rihanna on the album" – Probably should quote 'edgier' and 'angrier', as it's a bit WP:POV on their own.
- "was written by Justin Timberlake, Robin Tadross and James Fauntleroy II and produced by the three of them by their production name The Y's." → "was written by Justin Timberlake, Robin Tadross and James Fauntleroy II and produced by the latter three under their production name The Y's."
- "Timberlake told MTV News that the Rated R is a whole new sound" – Remove 'the'.
- "Rihanna admitted that "Cold Case Love" was inspired by her hard relationship" – 'difficult' would be a better choice of wording, less colloquial.
- "served as Tovar's assistant recording engineers, while, Antonio" – omit the second comma.
- "to fully emote, to show the feeling behind the stance." – Probably should quote this, and it's again a bit POVish.
- "Rihanna seems to discover the flip side" – should also quote this, same reason as the previous point.
- "Jody Rosen of Rolling Stone wrote Rihanna sings 'slow-boiling' the line 'What you did to me was a crime'." – This doesn't make sense.
- "A reviewer of Plugged In wrote that the lyrics that allude to are "And I let you reach me one more time/But that’s enough." → that allude to this are.
- "Jon Pareless of The New York Times wrote that Rihanna compares the love – I don't understand what 'the love' is referring to. The sentence in general needs some clarification.
- "and features the couplet" – replace and with 'which'.
Done — Tomíca(T2ME) 17:42, 16 June 2013 (UTC)
- References
15. GQ and Plugged In should have their publisher in brackets.
22. Hearst Magazines UK should be linked.
23. IAC (company) should be About.com's publisher.
27. 'Rap-Up, LLC' are Rap-Up's publisher.
Article looks good overall, putting on hold. Et3rnal 17:06, 16 June 2013 (UTC)
- Everything addressed. Passing. Et3rnal 20:26, 16 June 2013 (UTC)
- Thank you buddy! — Tomíca(T2ME) 20:40, 16 June 2013 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.