Talk:Dakshineswar Kali Temple/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Bill william compton (talk · contribs) 17:48, 1 January 2013 (UTC)
I would love to see this article as GA, but I'm afraid it's still not ready yet.

Few comments

• The lead should be a summary, and shouldn't have data which isn't discussed elsewhere in the article.
• The lead says: "The temple was built by Rani Rashmoni, a philanthropist and a devotee of Kali in 1855", but in History section: "The Dakshineswar Kali Temple was founded around the middle of the 19th Century by Rani Rashmoni". Not clear whether it was built in 1855 or the date of establishment is unknown.
• "Rani Rashmoni belonged to Kaivarta caste" - Why it is so important to mention her caste?
• Over-linking of Rani Rashmoni.
• Disambiguation link Divine Mother.
• "In the year 1847, Rashmoni, prepared to go upon a long pilgrimage to the sacred Hindu city of Kashi to express her devotions to the Divine Mother" - Improve the sentence.
• "Rani was to travel in twenty four boats, carrying relatives, servants and supplies.[4] According to traditional accounts, the night before the pilgrimage began, Rashmoni had a vision of the Divine Mother, in the form of the goddess Kali in a dream and reportedly" - Contradictory with the Ref4.
• Ref is improperly formatted. It should have page numbers.
• "According to traditional accounts" - What accounts?
• She was travelling to Kashi, but goddess Kali used word Banaras. Confusing for those readers who don't know that both are same.
• Quotation is contradictory with the one mentioned in Ref7.
• Use Rashmoni not Rani.
• "20-acred", use unit converter.
• "The large temple complex was built between 1847 and 1855" - Improve the sentence.
• "The 20-acre (81,000 m2) plot was bought from an Englishman, John Hastie and was then popularly known as Saheban Bagicha," - Contradictory with the Ref8. It says that the major portion of land was owned by John Hastie and rest was a Muslim cemetery.
• Link Tantra traditions.
• "shaped like a tortoise" - A 3-D tortoise lay figure shape or a top view of its back?
• "The 20-acre (81,000 m2) plot was bought from an Englishman, John Hastie and was then popularly known as Saheban Bagicha,[8] partly old Muslim burial ground shaped like a tortoise, considered befitting for the worship of Shakti according to Tantra traditions, it took eight years and nine hundred thousand rupees to complete the construction, and finally the idol of Goddess Kali was installed on the Snana Yatra day on 31 May 1855, amid festivities at the temple formally known as Sri Sri Jagadishwari Mahakali, with Ramkumar Chhattopadhyay as the head priest; soon his younger brother Gadai or Gadadhar (later known as Ramakrishna) moved in and so did nephew Hriday to assist him" - Break it into multiple sentences and improve coherence.
• Translation of Saheban Bagicha?
• Use either lakhs or hundred thousand.
• Link lakh.
• Decapitalize Goddess.
• "On 31 May 1855 more than 1 lakh Brahmins were invited from different parts of the country to grace the auspicious occasion amidst the controversy of the Rani being in no position to own a temple and to offer Brahmins to feed since she was belonged to the low cast of Shudra." - [Citation needed]
• "The next year, Ramkumar Chhattopadhyay died, the position was given to Ramakrishna, along with his wife Sarada Devi, who stayed in the south side of the Nahabat (music room), in a small room on the ground floor, which now a shrine dedicated to her." - [Not in reference]
• "From then until his death 30 years later in 1886, Ramakrishna was responsible for bringing much in the way of both fame and pilgrims to the temple." - How Ramakrishna was responsible for bringing fame and pilgrims to the temple?
• "Rani Rashmoni lived only for five years and nine months after the inauguration of the temple....." - Improve the whole paragraph.
• "Rani Rashmoni lived only for five years and nine months after the inauguration of the temple. She seriously fell ill in 1861. Realizing that her death was near she decided to handover the property she purchased in Dinajput (now in Bangladesh) as a legacy for the maintenance of the temple to the temple trust. She accomplished her task on 18 February 1861 and passed away on the next day." Copyright violation and paraphrasing.
• Another instance of copyright violation.

There is just too much to be done for this to make a GA. I am going to have to fail this article. — Bill william compton^Talk 17:48, 1 January 2013 (UTC)