Talk:Fanny Bullock Workman/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Adam Cuerden (talk · contribs) 21:33, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

First of all - Himalaya: This is more commonly seen as "Himalayas" in English: Is there a reason for the less-used variant?

I had that question during my peer review and Wadewitz said that "Himalaya" was correct, and I accepted her expert opinion. I'm not sure how we can get confirmation of the correct/standard usage.

There's some copyediting issues here. I'm trying to work through them as I go, but things like

“

Thomas Pauly writes in his short biography of Workman that "early on Fanny chafed at the constraints of her privilege", and a small number of stories survive describing her "early enthusiasm for adventure".[1] In one, "A Vacation Episode", she describes a beautiful and aristocratic English girl who is contemptuous of society.

”

...where it should really say "a small number of her stories survive", to make it clear that these are stories written by her, not gossip about her. In any case, I've fixed most of them. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 21:33, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, thanks.

In "Cycling tour of India", we read "They bicycled about 4,000 miles (6,400 km) from the southernmost tip of India to the northern mountains" - now, I believe the northern mountains are the Himalayas? If so, can't we phrase that as "to the Himalayas in the north"? It helps anchor readers who might be confused by the sudden appearance of a different term. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 21:39, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Done.

The section "Mountaineering in the Himalaya" has a lot of red links. While many of these might just be articles that don't exist, I have noticed in the past that Victorian sources can use slightly different spellings - in particular, they were more willing to Anglicize, so you'd get "Servia" for "Serbia", "Leipsic" for "Leipzig", and so on. Most of these aren't in use anymore, so it might well be that articles exist, and just need the redirect added. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 21:42, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Removed all but one, which I fixed.

Perhaps a bit more strangely, "Mount Bullock Workman" isn't linked. Is that name still used? If not, it would be good to give its modern name in parentheses after. This would apply to all such names that didn't stick, e.g. "Pyramid Peak" Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 21:45, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

That I don't know; really wish I could ask, ya know. According to this travel webpage [1], which was created in 2008, Mount Bullock Workman is still used. I fixed the Pyramid Peak (Wadewitz had actually misspelled "Spantik", which is why it was red-linked) and added a parenthetical about its modern name.

File:FannyBullockWorkmanVotesWomen.jpg - absolutely nothing wrong with this image. But I love it to pieces. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 21:50, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Yes, me too. Summarizes Workman's life all in one image.

Final verdict of the first review: It's one of Wadewitz's articles, and, unsurprisingly, is a strong, well-researched piece. A few minor issues I'd prefer to fix before promotion, but the article is basically there, and, once they're fixed, should be most of the way to FA. Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 21:58, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Yes, like I've said before, when Wadewitz asked me to review it, I said that I thought it was already ready for GA and that I was willing to just pass it then, but she refused because "I like lots of reviews!" Man, I miss her. But User:Adam Cuerden, thanks for the review. Christine (Figureskatingfan) (talk) 16:54, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Promoted - you taking this to FA after this? Adam Cuerden ^(talk) 18:28, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks, Adam; not right away because I already have a FAC in the queue. I'll let you know when I submit it. Christine (Figureskatingfan) (talk) 20:57, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]