Talk:Frederick Scherger
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Comments
[edit]In response to Ian's request for a mini-peer review, I have the following comments on the article:
- The annecdote about Scherger knocking out the other squadron leader seems a bit out of place given that it's placed after he returns from the UK
- I can probably put it all in strict chronological order.
- Done. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:53, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- I can probably put it all in strict chronological order.
- It might be worth explaining why he alone survived the inquiry into the bombing of Darwin (was this because he was the deputy commander of the NWA and hence not responsible for what went wrong, or was it due to his actions in his previous roles, or both?)
- No-one seems quite that explicit but consensus of the sources that go that deeply into it is that he probably wouldn't have survived but for the Lowe inquiry findings, which I did mention. Not sure how else to put it other than what I have but open to further suggestions...
- It might be worth briefly noting that the Vengeances were withdrawn because they were inferior to other aircraft which had become available and which needed their space at airfields rather than any defect on the part of 10OG and Scherger
- Didn't realise it might have come across like that - tks, will clarify.
- Done. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:53, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- Didn't realise it might have come across like that - tks, will clarify.
- The naming of the American groups in the sentence beginning "Over the course of the battle that commenced on 2 July" could be simplified
- Heh, I spent a bit of time checking all those USAAF unit links - are you suggesting drop their names and just say, e.g. "two fighter groups and two bomber groups of the USAAF"?
- I just changed it to what I think is a bit simpler in this edit, but wouldn't mind if it gets changed back. Nick-D (talk) 06:31, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- No it looks fine, tks. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:09, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- I just changed it to what I think is a bit simpler in this edit, but wouldn't mind if it gets changed back. Nick-D (talk) 06:31, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- Heh, I spent a bit of time checking all those USAAF unit links - are you suggesting drop their names and just say, e.g. "two fighter groups and two bomber groups of the USAAF"?
- Expanding on the action which earned the DSO would be interesting - why was the commander of the air component "in the forefront of the landing of the ground troops"?
- I don't think there's much more info supplied in Raynor, and the Gazette itself offers nought, but will see if there's anything to add.
- Was Scherger rehabilitating for the entire period between August 1944 and May 1945?
- No, he spent a bit of time as Air Member for Personnel before AOC 1TAF - tks for picking up.
- Done. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:53, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- No, he spent a bit of time as Air Member for Personnel before AOC 1TAF - tks for picking up.
- "He transferred plans and funding already in place for extension of the runway at Laverton to effect this" is a bit awkward (eg, how do you transfer a plan?)
- Heh, funnily enough, Raynor expressly mentioned the plans as well but I tend to agree with you about dropping that bit.
- Done. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:53, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- Heh, funnily enough, Raynor expressly mentioned the plans as well but I tend to agree with you about dropping that bit.
- It seems a bit of an over-statement to say that the RAAF had a "traditional reliance on Great Britain for hardware" at the time Scherger became CAS; from World War II most of its aircraft were of American origin and the RAAF often selected US designs over British ones
- Again, this is what the sources say but will see about the wording.
- Done. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:53, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- Again, this is what the sources say but will see about the wording.
- Is there any reason why the biography of Scherger is listed as being 'further reading' rather than a reference? (is it less than a reliable source, or were you unable to access a copy?
- No, deliberately left it out as the same author, Raynor, contributed the same year as he released the bio a 15-page+ essay on Scherg to Horner's The Commanders, which I've used extensively - given that plus the level of detail I already have here it seemed reasonable to leave the bio as 'further reading'.
- OK, I should be able to access a copy of it if you need references. Having it sit there unused is asking for trouble in a FAC review though... Nick-D (talk) 06:31, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- It's probably in the Mitchell. I suppose it'll give me issues leaving as is, knowing some reviewers, but I find it a strange attitude when the author's perspective is already covered, and there's plenty of detail in the article already and no reason to overbalance with more from one in particular. Why do we bother with 'further reading' sections in the first place? Perhaps I have blinkers on this point because a lot of people do seem to feel differently - and equally strongly - about it. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:09, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- OK, I should be able to access a copy of it if you need references. Having it sit there unused is asking for trouble in a FAC review though... Nick-D (talk) 06:31, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- No, deliberately left it out as the same author, Raynor, contributed the same year as he released the bio a 15-page+ essay on Scherg to Horner's The Commanders, which I've used extensively - given that plus the level of detail I already have here it seemed reasonable to leave the bio as 'further reading'.
- I've tweaked some passive wording, but may have missed some more. Nick-D (talk) 01:39, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- I have to admit to deliberately leaving the occasional passive voice simply because the sources employ it and I could be drawing a long bow to alter to the active. Tks very much for the review, Nick. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 03:33, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
As another note, I suspect that the copyright status for File:Frederick Scherger.jpg is wrong and the image isn't PD - no source is provided and, as we know, the RAAF is tight with images of its ex-commanders. Nick-D (talk) 06:35, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
- That's the image tidy-up I was referring to initially - I managed to secure GNU free licensing agreement from the RAAF for post-1955 images of Williams, Scherger, Rowland, McNamara and one or two others, just haven't transferred to Commons and done the OTRS thing yet. Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 10:09, 15 November 2009 (UTC)
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