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Talk:George H. W. Bush 1992 presidential campaign/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

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Reviewer: Muboshgu (talk · contribs) 01:54, 11 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I'll review this. Comments likely by tomorrow. – Muboshgu (talk) 01:54, 11 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for reviewing the article. Kavyansh.Singh (talk) 06:05, 11 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Well, first two three comments now: – Muboshgu (talk) 02:03, 11 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox
  • Please see MOS:SMALLFONT and remove the small font from the infobox.
  • Receipts US$101,936,902[1] This figure does not appear anywhere in the article. Please include it somewhere.
  • Robert Mosbacher also appears in the infobox but not the article. As the fundraiser, I imagine there may be a need for a section on fundraising that includes both him and the grand total.

Review continued (Lead to Opponents) – Muboshgu (talk) 00:03, 12 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Lead
Background
Preparing for a run
Republican presidential primaries
Republican National Convention
  • This first paragraph is huge and should be split in at least two.
  • With the Republican National Convention approaching,... We should say when the convention is first, and/or provide a little more concrete info on time here
  • were forced to play --> "played"
  • By this time, independent candidate Ross Perot had dropped out of the race, and Bill Clinton had officially secured the Democratic nomination. These are the first mentions of Clinton and Perot in the body. They both need to be linked, and there needs to be more context on who they are. We can't mention Perot saying he won't run when the article hadn't yet mentioned that he might run
  • George W Bush suggested Dick Cheney as VP? Lol. What does Cheney have on Dubya? Not a point for you to do anything with.
  • No need for given names in the sentence on delegates, or for Robert Teeter after the first mention. Teeter isn't linked in the body, only the infobox.
  • There is a need to source the delegate count sentence.
Opponents

Campaign section – Muboshgu (talk) 01:14, 12 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

August
September
October
Election day
Results
Aftermath
  • Add a little context on the note, at least saying that Bush left Clinton a note in the Oval Office before saying Clinton appreciated it, possibly mentioning that leaving these notes is a tradition
  • In 1999, Quayle announced a run for president against George W. Bush. Not exactly. They both ran for the same nomination, but this construction implies dubya was the incumbent.
  • Is there anything more we can add to the Bush/Clinton friendship? That is good aftermath.
Notes

Overall, this article is well written and well sourced. I'll put it on hold for a week to allow for improvements. – Muboshgu (talk) 01:52, 12 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Muboshgu – I think I have most of the major changes in these edits. I have replied to the concern about shifting the "Opponents" section. Would appreciate if you could review the changes and let me know if I missed anything major. Thanks for your review! Kavyansh.Singh (talk) 15:08, 12 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Great. I'm giving it another read now. – Muboshgu (talk) 02:34, 13 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Ok, finishing the read now. – Muboshgu (talk) 02:59, 14 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
I agree with leaving the "Opponents" section where it is. The only problem that I see is that the first mention of Clinton and Gore in the body don't give surnames and aren't linked, which happens in the "Republican National Convention" section, and then the full names without links are in the "Opponents" section. Fix that and give the article another sweep for MOS:SURNAME and MOS:JOBTITLES compliance and I think we're done. – Muboshgu (talk) 03:18, 14 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
@Muboshgu: I tried fixing that by adding links and full names in RNC section. Also, I gave another sweep of MOS:SURNAME. Kavyansh.Singh (talk) 03:40, 14 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Great. I'm happy to pass this as a GA. Congratulations! – Muboshgu (talk) 03:54, 14 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]
@Muboshgu – Thanks for promoting my first Good Article. Kavyansh.Singh (talk) 04:02, 14 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]