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Talk:Hurricane Norbert (2008)/GA2

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GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Titoxd(?!? - cool stuff) 01:30, 13 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I'll be reviewing the article in the next few days. Titoxd(?!? - cool stuff) 01:30, 13 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria


So far, I have only reviewed the article's lede, and I am not impressed. The entire section seems to be just a rehash of the meteorological history of the storm, with very little attention put to what the storm actually did. It needs a significant revamp for it to be an acceptable summary of the article.

  1. Is it reasonably well written?
    A. Prose quality:

$:** Reworded, but I don't think it makes sense. YE Pacific Hurricane 15:35, 22 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

    • Rescue workers had to rescue many Mexicans in low lying areas from their wood and metal homes.sheet metal, otherwise the sentence says something completely different.
    • In a drive-thru entrance, a happy hour sing was ripped off due to strong winds. — a happy hour sign?
    • Due to the hurricane, one visitor moved his trailer to a hotel as Norbert neared the Baja California Sur.[19] — also makes no sense, and I don't even see why this is relevant.
    • Local residents seeked to shelters by school buses and army trucks as floodwaters entered thier homes.sought shelter, not seeked to shelters
      • Reworded, and fixed the typo. 15:35, 22 August 2011 (UTC)
    • The storm also affected cruise ships. While Carnival Pride and Island Princess survived the worst of the hurricane, the Carnival Elation was expected arrive one day earlier than initially anticipated.[21] — all the ship names must be italicized. Also, it's "was expected to arrive".
    • A total of 25 people were killed [23] five of which were in Álamos.[1] — you need a comma before reference 23.
      • Added. 15:35, 22 August 2011 (UTC)
    • Total damages in Sonora, excluding the town of Álamos was estimated at MXN 800 million ($59.1 million).[26] — total damage; also, the formatting for your damage totals is weird. it's $800 million (year MXN, $59.1 million year USD). You also need to put which the base year of the damage sums for inflation adjustments.
    • At the port of Topolobampo rough seas from the storm sank four ships and damaged 70 others. — comma after Topolobampo
    • Roughly 6,000 people were left homeless in Sinaloa as hundreds of homes were damaged or destroyed by Norbert.[25] — finish talking about Sonora before starting to talk about Sinaloa. Both are state-level political entities, like Baja California and Baja California Sur. Also you need to link to Sinaloa, since you hadn't mentioned it before anywhere.
    • The town of Álamos sustained the most severe damage in the area, with damage in the town exceeding MXN 200 million ($14.7 million).[24] — fix the damage figure and add the base year for inflation calculations.
    • In Alamo, water rushed down the mountains nearby, — '
    • Some scared residents fled to rooftops and higher ground.A total of 95 homes were destroyed — add a space after the period.
      •  Done
    • A total of 95 homes were destroyed and concrete walls were knocked down. Cars and trucks smashed in trees. — how are the links to "cars", "trucks", "walls" and "trees" helpful to the reader here?
    • Furniture and other personal items were on the streets after the storm.[27] — why is "streets" linked here?
    • The fishing industry in Sinaloa sustained severe losses, with 200 shrimp boats being destroyed leaving MXN 8 million ($600,000) in damages.[28] — fix the damage figure and add the base year for inflation calculations.
    • On October 14, Governor Eduardo Bours Castelo of Sonora — link to Eduardo Bours
    • The municipalities of Ahome, El Fuerte, Choix, Guasave and Sinaloa de Leyva were declared disaster areas following the storm, — link to all of these municipalities; links are available at Municipalities of Sinaloa. (Also, Sinaloa de Leyva is a city, not a municipality. Was the city declared a disaster area or was it the municipality?)
    B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
    • From the comments above, fails WP:LEAD.
  1. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
    A. References to sources:
    B. Citation of reliable sources where necessary:
    C. No original research:
    • No concerns here.
  2. Is it broad in its coverage?
    A. Major aspects:
    • My main concern is that the article seems to gloss over the impact in Sinaloa. If there were multiple municipalities with federal disaster declarations, one vague sentence describing the impact in the state is not going to cut it for me.
    B. Focused:
  3. Is it neutral?
    Fair representation without bias:
  4. Is it stable?
    No edit wars, etc:
  5. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
    A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
    • All images confirmed to be in the public domain.
    B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:
    • No concerns here.
  6. Overall:
    Pass or Fail:
    The main problem is the lack of Sinaloa impact, so I'm putting the article on hold until that is resolved. Titoxd(?!? - cool stuff) 22:21, 20 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    There isn't any US impact either, which I believe is problematic. These sorts of storms usually cause US impact. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 16:25, 22 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    I've added what little US impact I found. I did find this, but I am unsure if it was related to Norbert. YE Pacific Hurricane16:49, 22 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    No, but NCDC does have stuff for New Mexico that should be included. --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 17:28, 22 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    I've given plenty of time for the deficiencies in the article to be corrected, and they have not been fully resolved to my satisfaction, primarily when it comes to fixing blatant typos. As such, I cannot stall this nomination any longer, and I'm failing the article. Please renominate this article when you fix all the points given above. Titoxd(?!? - cool stuff) 19:11, 7 September 2011 (UTC)[reply]