Talk:Solomon Islands at the 2020 Summer Olympics/GA1
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Nominator: Arconning (talk · contribs) 13:00, 27 May 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Fritzmann2002 (talk · contribs) 18:50, 1 July 2024 (UTC)
Hello again Arconning, I'm going to take this review too if you don't mind! Should have it finished by the end of the day, same routine as last time. Fritzmann (message me) 18:50, 1 July 2024 (UTC)
- Yep no worries from me! Thanks again :) Arconning (talk) 15:20, 2 July 2024 (UTC)
Prose
- Suggest adding the same explanations as for Nauru for the universality slots
Done.
- "the nation's participation at these Games served as a learning ground for their hosting of the 2023 Pacific Games." I'm not sure if this passes neutrality. Perhaps saying something like "Solomon Islands stated that they considered their participation at these games..." and perhaps putting 'learning ground' in quotes since it is a phrase taken directly from the media release
Done.
- "that allowed them to return to the country due to measures brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic" I think a bit more elaboration on this is due. Readers in the future will likely not be as familiar with the intricacies of COVID laws and practices as we are.
Done, hopefully.
- "took the gold" seems like a colloquialism and I recommend changing to "won the race"
Done.
- "helped her train at the Oceania Weightlifting Institute..." would "allowed her to train..." be more appropriate?
Done. Yep!
- "but was then stranded at Nauru..." did she meet the other competitors there and then go straight to Japan? That was my understanding of the statement but it could be made explicit
Done. I believe that's okay? Let me know if you have any problems with it.
- The quotebox could perhaps be moved to the last paragraph, since it seems to tie in with that a bit more. I also narrowed its width, but feel free to revert that if you don't think it displays well
Done.
- "experience she learned" perhaps to "experiences she gained from..." or something similar
Done.
- I've taken the liberty of doing some other minor copyediting. As always, feel free to revert anything you don't agree with or let me know here.
References
- A reference for the Competitors section is needed
- Earwig gives an astounding 0.0% similarity, and I have no copyvio concerns from spot checked references
- Source-text integrity spot checks are good (Refs 3, 8, 15, and 35)
Just a few minor fixes, then good to go. Drop me a ping for a final sweep and pass once completed! Fritzmann (message me) 01:32, 4 July 2024 (UTC)
- @Fritzmann2002 I believe everything's good now! Arconning (talk) 04:05, 4 July 2024 (UTC)
- Yeah looks excellent, promoting now. I'm sure I'll work with you again over the course of the DCWC, so thank you for some truly polished and professional articles! Your work is a true boon to the encyclopedia. Fritzmann (message me) 13:35, 4 July 2024 (UTC)
- Goshh that really mean's a lot, thank you so much!! Arconning (talk) 13:35, 4 July 2024 (UTC)
- Yeah looks excellent, promoting now. I'm sure I'll work with you again over the course of the DCWC, so thank you for some truly polished and professional articles! Your work is a true boon to the encyclopedia. Fritzmann (message me) 13:35, 4 July 2024 (UTC)