Talk:Typhoon Fanapi/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Cyclonebiskit (talk · contribs) 05:30, 9 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Lede

... was the first typhoon to make landfall in Taiwan since Typhoon Morakot in August 2009. – Rather boring way to start off an article, don'tcha think? A year and change really isn't that long of a period for a given location to go without landfall, even by WPac standards. It should also at least include a mention of the year the storm took place in.

Good point. Changed the lead around, which affects the next two points. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

It was the eleventh tropical storm and fourth typhoon of the season. – Assuming you add the year to the preceding sentence, the end of this should be "annual season", otherwise it would be "2015 season".
The storm formed on September 14, 2010, and eventually intensified to reach 10 minute maximum sustained winds of 175 km/h (110 mph). – Remove year since it will be included in one of the two preceding sentences. A location of where it formed is necessary for context.
The summary of the meteorological history is very skimpy overall. There's no mention of general conditions that steered or fueled the storm. Needs to be fleshed out all around.

I didn't want to include too many details for the MH in the lead, but I added a bit more about the steering. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

{{refn}} needed for the standard disclaimer that all mentions of money are in 2010 values of their respective currency.

Don't know how I missed that! ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Complete lack of preparation and aftermath details, both are necessary—at least in brief—to appropriately summarize the event.

Better? I added a bit more. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Fanapi dropped the heaviest rainfall in 100 years, peaking at 1,126 mm (44 in) in Majia, Pingtung. – Impact section states that the rains in Majia were the heaviest in 10 years, not 100. Heaviest in 50 years in mentioned for some unspecified area as well.

Ack, I was probably drunk. Fixed. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

- Mention of retirement should be tacked on after the aftermath information.

Meteorological history

General comment: An overall revamp of the section for better flow would be nice, but there's nothing technically wrong with the style. What I mean is the current style of "JMA said X and JTWC say Y" is rather monotonous. Focus on classifications by the JMA, i.e. "Fanapai became a typhoon" rather than "the JMA upgraded Fanapi to a typhoon". Wording it this way makes it more engaging.

Hmm, is it OK that I just tweak the typhoon references? Or does it need a whole revamp? ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

An area of convection, or thunderstorms, persisted west of Guam on September 13, associated with the monsoon trough. – change to "in association with a monsoon trough."

Got it. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Late on September 14, the Japan Meteorological Agency (JMA) designated the system as a tropical depression to the east of the Philippine island of Luzon. Around the same time, the Joint Typhoon Warning Center (JTWC) classified the system as Tropical Depression 12W about 770 km (475 mi) south of Okinawa. – Two locations for the same time is overkill, just use one.

Eek, yea. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

... Typhoon Fanapi made landfall over eastern Taiwan near Hualien City with winds of 162 km/h (101 mph), according to Taiwan's Central Weather Bureau. – Why the sudden shift to the CWB? Also, the standard these winds are measured in should be mentioned.

I don't have a landfall intensity from JTWC or JMA, or an exact location. Does that make sense? ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Preparations

Need to specify somewhere in the first sentence that the preps begin for Taiwan.

Done. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Dates would be appreciated to get a sense of chronology

Most of the preparations happened within a day or two though. I'll add it if you think it's necessary, but a lot of them are just broad, general preparations ahead of the storm's arrival. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Missing details for the Philippines from the NDRRMC

None of those links have any info though that's worth putting in the article. It's all about the storm's position, but there weren't any watches or warnings, or anything on how the storm affected the Philippines. It mostly talks about the ITCZ, but that wasn't Fanapi. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Impact

Rainfall rates there reached 100 mm (4 in) per hour at one point, totaling 506 mm (19.9 in); this was the heaviest in 50 years – Where were these measurements made?

This is all about Kaohsiung, which was specified in the previous sentence. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The South-Link Line was shut down after a railroad bridge along the Taimali River. – After the bridge what? Don't leave me in suspense! :P

Ahh! Five months of suspense, I promise it was worth the wait :P ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Aftermath

Taiwan's president Ma Ying-jeou toured the flooded regions on September 23, emphasizing efforts to drains the flooding. – typo with "drains"; also, was he emphasizing work as a form of praise or criticism? Current wording leaves me unclear as to the purpose behind the statement.

It was actually that he wanted to stop the political discourse of who to blame and instead focus on draining the floods. The news article says Asked to respond to comments from Kaoshiung City's mayor, Chen Chu, that the central government is responsible for 80% of the flooding that has been caused in the area, Ma said that this is not the right time to discuss the subject and that the current priority should be to drain flooded areas and restore water and electricity supplies. I didn't want to get into politics, unless you think it's needed. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

USD conversions needed for ¥240 million (CNY) and ¥1 million (CNY).

Done. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

References

Citations 34 and 36 deadlink and need to be replaced.

Fixed both. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Technically I believe you're fine as is with reference formatting, but I think you should take the opportunity to practice what Hylian Auree has taught the project about citations. Won't hold this against the GAN, however.

Ahhhhhh. Those suck :/ If I ever go for FAC, I'll definitely fix up the references, but if it's OK, I'll hold off on the references. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I've placed the article on-hold for now to allow you time to address these issues. ~ Cyclonebiskit (chat) 07:13, 9 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks so much for the review! Sorry for the delay in getting to it - been busy IRL, but freer now. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 18:36, 20 October 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Terribly sorry for my rudely delayed response. Everything looks good now so I'm passing the article. ~ Cyclonebiskit (chat) 16:51, 1 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]