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Talk:William de Chesney/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Ironholds (talk) 14:28, 17 February 2010 (UTC)[reply]

  • "Chesney was a member of a large family, and one of his brothers became Bishop of Lincoln and another was Abbot of Evesham Abbey" - "Chesney was part of a large family; one of his brothers became Bishop of Lincoln and another Abbot of Evesham Abbey", I'd suggest. Also, link the brothers;
  • Reworded per your suggestion, on the other I've got the brothers linked below when their names are mentioned, I'm trying to avoid the easter egg linkish feel of linking "brother" or "another" in the lede.
  • Is there any way to expand the lede?
  • "was a Anglo-Norman " - "was an Anglo-Norman", surely?
  • "As well as his offices, Chesney had control of some royal castles, and served Stephen in some of Stephen's campaigns in England." - "As well as his administrative offices, Chesney controlled some royal castles, and served Stephen in some of his English campaigns."
  • Add the Sheriff of Blogland bluelinks to the infobox
  • Is the image appropriate? That space is meant to identify the bloke rather than his possessions.
  • Since there are no images at all for the guy (I'd be very surprised if there were, is what I mean), it's my usual practice to include a "place he lived" image in the infobox. It's never been an issue with all of my GAs (50-some) and the 20-some FAs on medieval guys. Ealdgyth - Talk 16:05, 17 February 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • "William had a brother Roger.[3] Another brother was Robert de Chesney, who later became Bishop of Lincoln.[4] A third brother, Reginald, became abbot of Evesham Abbey.[5] Other siblings were Hugh, Ralph, Hawise, Beatrice and Isabel" - can you merge this into one sentence?
  • "William de Chesney was the " - elsewhere you've just used Chesney.
  • "Following King Henry's death in 1135" - link "Henry" to distinguish which one it is.
  • "and in 1138 also the support " - "and in 1138 the support "
  • Link Robert of Gloucester
  • "have been owned Chesney or held by tenants who held the lands from Chesney" - "have been owned by Chesney or held by tenants he leased the land to"
  • "who was a firm supporter of the Angevin cause" - indicate which side of the Matilda/Stephen dispute this was on
  • "1159 through 1161" - "1159 to 1161"
  • went with "through to" but I don't really think of that as an americanism. Of course, I spend so much time reading both Brit and Yank works that I'm totally confused about a lot of stuff... Ealdgyth - Talk 20:10, 17 February 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  • You've misspelt "niece".