Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/List of Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl chapters/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was not promoted by User:Scorpion0422 23:03, 3 June 2008 [1].

List of Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl chapters

This is a complete listing of the Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl manga volumes and chapters along with descriptions for the volumes, and with the chapter titles all verified in their English and Japanese forms. I believe it satisfies the FL requirements and meets the level of quality of similar lists as in List of Claymore chapters and List of Naruto chapters (Part I).--十八 07:08, 5 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments - what is the purpose of the "Series chronology" section and why have it here instead of in the main article? I can't see what value it adds to the list and it seems out of place. Also, the plot seem overly long, pushing 500 words in some instances. Why use "List of volumes and chapters" as a header instead of the most standard "Volume list" as seen in the FLs you pointed to?Collectonian (talk) 07:23, 5 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

That's funny, I didn't catch the header; I initially pattered the list off List of Yotsuba&! chapters which bears the same heading, but it's changed now. Also, I got the idea for the series chronology from the non-FL List of Kodomo no Jikan chapters, but I moved it to the main article as you suggested. As for the summaries, I do realize that they are quite lengthy, but when I initially discussed this here when {{Graphic novel list}} was first instituted, I was told that lengthy summaries were unavoidable with volumes that cover a lot of material; even with one or two sentences a chapter, that amounts to a lot. If I try to shorten them dramatically, than much of the context from a volume summary will be lost, or will be so curt that it won't be adequate enough to provide a concise summary of a given volume. As I said, I tried to seek guidance on this issue, but no one said longer summaries weren't allowed, especially when you consider how long normal novel summaries are supposed to be under WP:NOVEL. Furthermore, the main-part summary for volume one of Kashimashi (not counting the small omake description below it) is slightly smaller than the volume 1 summary of the list you worked on, List of Marmalade Boy chapters. The main-part summaries for volumes 2-4 are also approximately that same length, with volume 5 being the more bloated of all. I could scrap all the omake descriptions that are there, effectively bringing the word count to a more reasonable limit, if you'd like.--十八 09:22, 5 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Yeah, I had to cut Marmalade's down to 300 words or so each :( I think the omake/extra's could be scrapped, but curious as to what the current precedence is. Neither Claymore nor Naruto seems to have extra chapters to give descriptions of, and Marmalade really doesn't either, but I have some other chapter lists that do that I'm also getting ready for FLC, so it would be good to know for sure. And if they are allowed, at what length they should be. Collectonian (talk) 14:18, 5 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Agreed on the need for a copyedit. Other than that, everything meets the FLC criteria. The content is well sourced and the formatting is good. A one sentence mention that the chapters were adapted into an anime series would seem to be appropriate, though.-- Collectonian (talk · contribs) 08:31, 29 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I don't see exactly why. Why should adaptations matter on an article that's only about the manga? And why only mention the anime then? There was also a light novel, drama CD, and video game. I think going into adaptation info would not be focused in terms of providing a list of chapters for the manga.--十八 08:38, 29 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Because the anime was adapted from the chapters of the manga. The light novel and drama CDs could also be noted, if they are adapted from the manga itself. It is part of the basic information of the manga, and speaks to the chapters. List of Naruto manga volumes, List of Naruto chapters (Part I), List of Naruto chapters (Part II) (all FLs and together an FT), and List of Claymore chapters (also FL) mention their adaptations. -- Collectonian (talk · contribs) 08:54, 29 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Yeah, those articles do, but that was up to editor preference, not convention or consensus, so I don't see a reason for adding in the info about the anime when the main article takes care of it.--十八 10:02, 29 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Resolved comments from Matthew

Comments Concerns regarding prose. This is from the first summary only:

"After Hazumu Osaragi is pressured by his friends Tomari Kurusu and Asuta Soro to confess to the girl he likes, Yasuna Kamiizumi, he goes along with it, but is turned down." — Confesses what? "Goes along with it" is a bit colloquial. Sentence is a little long and clunky
"In order to rectify his death, the alien brings Hazumu back to life only to switch his gender completely, and returns her to her former life" — accidentally switches his gender, or purposefully
"Due to this, reporters constantly want to interview Hazumu about the incident, which bothers her, and Tomari, greatly whom has to protect Hazumu from them." — too many commas. Try "Reporters constantly attempt to interview Hazumu about the incident, which bothers her and Tomari, who has to shield Hazumu from their advances."
"After the change, Hazumu learns some things about being a girl" — What things?
"When the sketch contest comes around again at school," — "Comes around" is unencyclopedic, and why the word "again"?
" Hazumu discovers Yasuna's unique affliction to not be able to see males clearly, but instead as hazy outlines." — discovers how? Affliction or ability?
"Tomari walks in on them in the process, shocking her greatly." — Is kissing a process?

I haven't checked out the other summaries. I think this should be taken to WP:FR and also given a thorough copy-edit. -- Matthewedwards (talk · contribs · count · email) 21:52, 23 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I tried cleaning up the summaries as best I could, though someone else may need to finalize it. Also, WP:FR goes to Wikipedia:WikiProject France, so I don't know what you wanted to direct me to.--十八 01:24, 24 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry, WP:PR -- Matthewedwards (talk · contribs · count · email) 02:37, 24 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose The article still needs a good copy edit. I suggest taking this to WP:PR. For example, "After Tomari catches Hazumu and Yasuna kissing, she tries to avoid Hazumu for several days afterwards." After and afterwards in the same sentence is very clumsy. Also read WT:FLC#Straight repetitions of the title in the opening sentence and WP:LS#Bold title regarding the repetition of the article title in the lead and the bold text + wikilinks. -- Matthewedwards (talk · contribs · count · email) 05:22, 29 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Are you suggesting that I unbold the bolded portion in the lead and make it more like the lead of List of University of Waterloo people (which I just altered)? And if the only other concern is a good copyediting, wouldn't taking this to WP:LCE be the proper place (or else ask help from WP:ANIME)?--十八 06:37, 29 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Yeah, something like that would be fine. LCE seems to be abandoned, so check out WP:PR volunteers and find someone who does copyedits. Matthewedwards (talk · contribs · count · email) 20:10, 29 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose, not enough citations. GreenJoe 00:28, 28 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

What more do you want me to cite, if I may ask? If there is nothing else that needs citing, then it has enough citations.--十八 05:50, 28 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.