Wikipedia:Peer review/Auctionair/archive1
| Toolbox |
|---|
This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because this is my first article and I want to get it right!
Thanks, Ship69 (talk) 11:42, 29 January 2010 (UTC)
Ruhrfisch comments: this is a good start, especially for a first article, but it needs some more work to conform to the Manual of Style and guidlelines here. So with improvement in mind, here are some suggestions.
- The lead should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article. Nothing important should be in the lead only - since it is a summary, it should all be repeated in the body of the article itself. So the whole notion of sealed-bid auctions is only explicitly in the lead and should be in the article too.
- My rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way - but as two examples, history and sale of unclaimed winning bids are not in the lead. Please see WP:LEAD
- Biggest problem as I see it with the article right now is a lack of inline references (there are only two now). My rule of thumb is that every quote, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and every paragraph needs a ref. See WP:CITE and WP:V
- Per WP:CITE references come AFTER punctuation, and are usually at the end of a sentence or phrase so fix In 2006 the company launched The Times Online Auction Room[2] as a co-branded partnership with The Times
- Most of the External links should be converted into inline references. At least one (Good Web Guide) is a dupicate of current ref 2, so should just be removed.
- External links are typically for things that are useful for understanding the subject of the article but are not used as references. The official website should be listed here, but I am not sure any of the others should be. See WP:EL
- External links is not for links to Wikipedia articles (those are internal links). These can be placed in a See also section, but that is usually for articles not already linked in the article (which Spafax already is). See WP:See also
- Please add more wikilinks to the article - The Times and many of the businesses mentioned could be linked, for example. Please see WP:Build the web
- There is a one sentence section and some short (one or two sentence) paragraphs - these break up the flow of the article and should be merged with others or perhaps expanded
- Any chance for a free image of the headquarters building or one of the key personnel? Business articles can use the company's logo as a WP:FAIR USE image
- A model article is useful for ideas and examples to follow - see the article on BAE Systems for a British business example that is a Featured Article and may be a good model
Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 22:08, 6 February 2010 (UTC)