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Wikipedia:Peer review/California State Polytechnic University, Pomona/archive1

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because… I intend to nominate it for FA and I'd like to hear some feedback.

Thank you, Marco Guzman, Jr  Chat  15:52, 15 September 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Nikkimaria
  • See here for a list of potentially problematic links
  • WP:OVERLINK: don't link very common terms like United States, and don't link the same terms multiple times
  • Avoid vague time statements like "in recent years" where possible
  • Spell out numbers under 10
  • Check punctuation throughout, particularly hyphens/dashes
  • Prose in general is a bit dense and inaccessible to non-specialist readers
  • When a measurement is being used as an adjective, be sure to employ the adjective parameter of the convert template
  • Spell out "%" in article text
  • Don't use contractions outside of direct quotes
  • What is "water intrusion"? "sense of arrival"? Check for potentially unfamiliar terms and phrases
  • Don't italicize organizations, languages, etc
  • Be consistent in whether you use hyphens, dashes or slashes when notating an academic or fiscal year
  • Citation(s) for Pep Band section, Rose Parade section?
  • Don't link terms in See also already linked in article text
  • No citations to Powell 1956. Nikkimaria (talk) 13:33, 27 September 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for the comments Nikkimaria, I'll work on them ASAP. -- Marco Guzman, Jr  Talk  15:50, 29 September 2011 (UTC)[reply]