Wikipedia:Peer review/Cheesesteak/archive1

Cheesesteak

Looking to see if this meets FAC status. J.reed 05:11, 20 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Please reorder/rename the last few sections to follow guidelines at WP:GTL.

Per WP:MOS#Headings, headings generally should not repeat the title of the article. For example, if the article was Ferdinand Magellan, instead of using the heading ==Magellan's journey==, use ==Journey==.

Per WP:MOSNUM, at Units of measurement, numbers with SI units of measure should have conversions in US customary units and vice versa. These conversions should keep to similar values of precision. For example, "the Moon is 380,000 kilometres (240,000 mi) from Earth". Note that the converted unit of measure uses a standard abbreviation, while the source unit is spelled out in the text.

Per WP:MOSNUM, please spell out source units of measurements in text; for example, "the Moon is 380,000 kilometres (240,000 mi) from Earth.

Per WP:MOSNUM, when doing conversions, please use standard abbreviations: for example, miles -> mi, kilometers squared -> km², and pounds -> lb.
The article has a few or too many inline external links, which hamper the readibility of the article. Please convert them to footnotes, preferably in the cite.php format recommended by WP:WIAFA.

Thanks, AndyZ _t 12:51, 20 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

You're welcome.

Every request above this line should have been included at the time of this message. Please note below if something was missed or if there are other suggestions. -J.reed 01:40, 21 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

WP:LEAD tells us to only summarize the contents of the article in the lead section (not provide anything that won't be further elaborated upon later on).
Go with a more concise first sentence, see Wikipedia:Guide to writing better articles#The first sentence.
Deconstruct the sandwich in the body of the article, like in an Ingredients section.
Provide a history of the sandwich in a History section. (see Hamburger for inspiration)
Why is "Hoagie roll" capitalized? why not just a bun?

Don't know about the capitalization; but probably because the region generally calls it that. J.reed

04:15, 22 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Is there not a more appetizing image available for the opening of the article?

Thats how they look. Looks pretty tasty to me! I'll try to take some more of the far superior Geno's when I am there next. J.reed

04:15, 22 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

With the writing, avoid short paragraphs and sections, especially one-liners.
Avoid editorializing, like "Controversy abounds..." and "...cheesesteak, surprisingly, is Los Angeles." Peer Review 06:08, 21 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Please provide WP:CITE information for references/footnotes. See also WP:CITE/ES; templates like {{Cite web}} and {{Cite book}} may be useful here.
There are a lot of typos in the References section that need to be fixed (missing titles, extra ]s, etc.)
Please alphabetize the categories and interlanguage links.
This article is a bit list-weighty; in other words, some of the lists should be converted to prose (paragraph form). For example, see "Best of Philly award winners".
AndyZ _t 13:35, 21 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]

Significant changes occurred at this time including a majority of the above suggestions. J.reed 04:15, 22 May 2006 (UTC)[reply]