Wikipedia:Peer review/Georgi Kinkladze/archive2

Georgi Kinkladze

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This current good article about a Georgian footballer was peer reviewed a couple of months ago, with thoughts of an FAC nomination at an indefinite point in the future. Thanks to Jhony, the article has now been beefed up with more detail about his later career and has a free-use image. The changes are numerous, so this is a second peer review before taking this to FAC to deal with any issues that have arisen since the first one. Oldelpaso (talk) 19:20, 21 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from The Rambling Man (talk · contribs)

Contributed before, hope to help this on its way to FA eventually...

"he became something of a " - a bit vague for an encyclopaedia, can we tighten this up?
- Struck the "something of".
"He finished his career..." would it be better to say "He ended his football playing career..." just in case he has subsequent careers?
- Done.
Seems a little OTT but consider linking "roubles" appropriately, esp. as you link GBP.
- Done.
"In September 1994 Georgia played Moldova in Tbilisi." - emphasise Kinki's role, even if it's just to say he played in it.
- Done, though unfortunately I don't have much detail other than that he played in it.
"unaffordable luxury" - can you cite this as a quote? (Probably said it before...)
- Yes, this one came up it the GA review, where my response was The term is mine rather than one from a ref, but it is used by way of summary. Both Perfect 10 and Blue Moon Rising go into the relationship between Royle and Kinkladze at length. Having already used a quote from Royle I think a second quote would be excessive, and "Royle viewed Kinkladze as an unaffordable luxury" sums up the picture portrayed by both books.
Order citations numerically... [83][7] would be better as [7][83].
- Done.
score, result in table should be separated by en-dash.
- Done. Oldelpaso (talk) 20:43, 21 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Otherwise it's incredibly well referenced, a good read and well suited to going over to FAC. (In my opinion!). The Rambling Man (talk) 20:11, 21 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]