Wikipedia:Peer review/List of Fairy Tail characters/archive1
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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because we have been working on this for a potential FL candidate over the past couple of months and has gone through an extensive copyedit. I would like to have some feedback on how we can improve this list even further.
Thanks, Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 00:36, 14 May 2012 (UTC)
I am halting this peer review one week from today per the discussion at Talk:List of Fairy Tail characters#Peer review. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 02:51, 14 May 2012 (UTC)
Peer review restarted. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 20:58, 22 May 2012 (UTC)
Comments
- Lead could be longer. The list is mammoth and therefore the lead could easily handle more info (don't forget it's supposed to summarise the entire article).
- Lead image could then be bigger, and the caption should be improved to describe the characters shown.
- Also, captions shouldn't have a period unless they're complete sentences.
- You should use DISPLAYTITLE to ensure Fairy Tale is shown as Fairy Tail in the article title.
- "rambunctious titular guild" ok but you haven't said that Fairy Tail is a guild...
- J. R. R. Tolkien has spaces between the J and the R etc.
- " For the relationship between Natsu and Igneel, " who's Igneel? You mentioned him in the lead but you should be expanding here.
- Expanded. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 22:42, 8 June 2012 (UTC)
- "he had a lot of yelling in the" okay, but doesn't read very encyclopaedically.
- What is ADR?
- Clarified. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 22:42, 8 June 2012 (UTC)
- "(妖精の尻尾フェアリーテイル) Fearī Teiru?)," seems to be missing a (
- café -> cafe. Sufficiently anglicised now to avoid the accent.
- "He joins Fairy Tail..." reiterate Natsu here (because the last "he" you mentioned was Igneel).
- "[ch. 1,5] " space after the comma. Ditto throughout.
- "in using celestial magic... using a set of . ... She uses a ..." repetitive.
- "Heartfilia[n 3]," note after the comma.
- "becomes more friendly with " -> more friendly = friendlier.
- "halves their affects if " that'd be "effects".
- Generally, I find the frequency of citations and notes to be off-putting. Consider putting them all at the end of sentences so I can read the prose and only have to wait until the end of the sentence I'm reading before I find the appropriate citation.
- General again, no more fair use images you could use here for these characters? Since for some of them you go a way to explain how they appear (e.g. Happy), I would imagine that would constitute good grounds for a FU image.
- "In the Japanese series, her voice actress is Yui Horie.[11]" one example of where you don't have the corresponding English dub artist. Why not?
- Funimation does not have the license to dub the episodes yet. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 22:42, 8 June 2012 (UTC)
- "S-Class Wizard" be consistent with capitalisation of W/wizard.
- "Shadow Gear[n 14], " note after punctuation.
- "[ch. 244-248]" en-dash for ranges.
- "can even turn her" no need for "even".
- "but loses an arm, leg, and some organs as a result" sounds serious. Most people don't get over losing "some organs". Perhaps you could specify?
- In the "Other wizards" section, although it pains me, it's probably worth making the names of each of them bold.
- Reedus Jonah has a [citation needed] which should be fixed.
That's a good start. About half-way through. Please apply common comments above to the rest of the article. The Rambling Man (talk) 17:21, 7 June 2012 (UTC)
Note A second peer review was opened while this one was still active, so per this request on my talk page diff, I moved the relevant PR comments here and will delete the second PR. Ruhrfisch ><>°° 04:14, 9 June 2012 (UTC)
Comments from Tintor2 The article looks very good but I'm not too familiar with the series so I'll leave some issues I found
- A section named "Minor characters and groups" sounds as if they are not really notable characters, so maybe their information could be unsuitable in an encyclopedia.
- Okay. Changed to "Other characters and guilds". Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 19:48, 8 June 2012 (UTC)
- Sections like Jellal Fernandes contain several plot details that can be trimmed.
- The reception section only uses sources from Anime News Network. Probably IGN, DVD, FandomPost and UK Anime Network also have reviews from Fairy Tail to add more opinions.