Wikipedia:Peer review/Rova of Antananarivo/archive1
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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like to make it the first article related to the people of Madagascar (not the wildlife) to make it to FA. I've put a lot of work into making it complete but can't be entirely objective so welcome any and all comments to make the article stronger. Thank you! -- Lemurbaby (talk) 05:06, 24 April 2011 (UTC)
- More specifically, I invite anyone to share their opinion on the use of italics to denote the names of buildings on the Rova compound. The advantage here is that it would help readers to distinguish between the names of people and buildings which may be otherwise difficult to tell apart. Drawbacks are the frequent use of italics could be an eyesore or distraction. Normally italics for foreign words would either be used on the first appearance only or for every use thereafter. I'm not following any particular standard yet but this article should conform to some consistent style standard before it makes it to FA. Comments? -- Lemurbaby (talk) 09:33, 26 April 2011 (UTC)
Ruhrfisch comments: This seems in pretty good shape to me - thanks for your work on it and other articles related to Madagascar. Here are some suggestions for improvement with FAC in mind.
- I read WP:ITALIC and the practice of italicizing the names of buildings within the article seems to be OK under that (to me at least - they are works of artifice and are foreign words not common in English (where the names of royal people and places are the English names)). I would make sure it is done consistently throughout the article though (so is Rova italicized or not (it is not in the first sentence of the lead)? Or why aren't the building names in headers italicized?
- Upon reflection, where rova is the name of the complex, I don't think it should be italicized because it is commonly referred to by Malagasy and foreigners alike by that name, whereas the names of other buildings are arguably less likely to be called by their Malagasy names (with the exception perhaps of Manjakamiadana, Tranovola and Manampisoa). But in the interest of consistency I'll leave all building names italicized and the name of the compound non-italicized. Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- I think it would also help to put a note in the article explaining this, and probably a hidden comment at the top of the article or in the edit notice (so other editors would see it if they edited the article).
- Done. Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- If the goal is to use italics only for building names (and the Rova itself), why is andriana italicized in the lead (but not later in the Besakana and other houses)? It is OK to italicize foreign words in general
- I intend to consistently italicize all foreign words - hopefully I haven't overlooked any. Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- At FAC reviewers will expect better consistency in usages - for example sometimes the names are translated on first use, but other times they are not - the untranslated names are usually French, but I am not sure what the translation of "Mahitsielafanjaka" is, though the article notes is also called "Mahitsy ("Straight" or "Upright")".
- Fixed. Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- I would also be consistent on order - is it native name first or English name first (so "noble class (andriana)" in the lead but "nobles (andriana)" later in the article. See this example sentence Andrianjaka's army then cleared the forest covering the hill's summit and constructed a rova or enclosure to serve as an initial garrison, as well as a simple wooden house within it as a royal residence (lapa) for the king.[4] So rova first, lapa second; translation or rova without parentheses, lapa in parentheses.
- Fixed. Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- Why do most names start with "the" or are at least preceded by the, but Fiangonana does not in the lead?
- Removed "the" - it seems more consistent now. Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- I think I would give some idea in the first paragraph of the lead when the active period of construction and reconstruction within the Rova was ("originally built and rebuilt between 1610 and 1867")
- Would the header "Prior to 1792" be better as "1610 to 1792"?
- Fixed Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- Could a map showing the location of Antananarivo within Madagascar be added? Perhaps in the first History section (which has no images)?
- Language is very good, but this is a bit rough The site retained this role until Antananarivo was captured in 1794 when it was reincorporated into the unified Kingdom of Imerina by King Andrianampoinimerina (1787–1810) as its capital.[10] Perhaps split into two sentences like The site retained this role until Antananarivo was captured in 1794. King Andrianampoinimerina (1787–1810) then reincorporated it [the city?] into the unified Kingdom of Imerina as its capital.[10]
- Changed in a slightly different way - What do you think?Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- 1792–1810 section says the capital was shifted to Antananarivo in 1792, but the previous section says the king did not capture Antananarivo until 1794. Which is it?
- Clarified. Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- Sampy names inconsistently italicized in 1792-1810 section (first italicized, three others not)
- Fixed Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- Why are the last two rulers in 1810–1896 not idetified as either King or Queen (as the earlier ones in this section were)?
- Perhaps use "renamed" instead of "known as" in Completed in 1819, the resulting wooden palace, known as Tranovola ("Silver House"), ...?
- Fixed Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- In 1896–present I would link the 1st, 2nd and 3rd Republics
- Those are articles that haven't been written yet - the post-independence period is neglected in the existing History of Madagascar article. I've been chipping away at that one for a while... it's definitely on my To Do list. :) Lemurbaby (talk) 22:51, 14 May 2011 (UTC)
- I would also give some idea of the distance from ABohiminga to the Rova (movement of the tombs)
- WP:HEAD says to avoid repeating the name of the article in headers if at all possible. Could Buildings of the Rova compound just be Buildings? The reader already knows the article is about the Rova
- two acres needs to be in hectares (or other metric units). The article also uses metric first throughout
More to come - stopping for now
- Organization of the last paragraph of Manjakamiadana is a bit odd - description of two ground floor rooms (is Malagasy astrology really concerned with furniture and not stars?), then the building not being occupied, then back to use of one of the ground floor rooms (for treaties)
- L'Ecole le Myre de Vilers or Ecole le Myre de Vilers? Both are used.
- Not a grammatical sentence A small villa in the form of a Greek cross designed by James Cameron for Queen Rasoherina,[19] construction of Manampisoa ("Adding What is Pleasant"), also called Lapasoa ("Beautiful Palace"), was overseen by William Pool.[24] Perhaps something like Manampisoa ("Adding What is Pleasant"), a small villa in the form of a Greek cross, was designed by James Cameron for Queen Rasoherina;[19] construction of Manampisoa, also called Lapasoa ("Beautiful Palace"), was overseen by William Pool.[24] wouild be clearer.
- A Greek cross has arms that all the same length, but the dimensions given for Manampisoa do not seem to be those of a Greek cross.
- Besakana to the west is believed to be the first residence of a Merina sovereign on the Rova site. to the west of what? The other driections in this section are also unclear (in relation to what?)
- Mahitsielafanjaka is the only structure whose reconstruction is described here - for all the others the description is only of the sturucture in the era of the kings and queens and how it was used in colonial times. If there is any description from the fire, it is in relation to the original structure (liek the fact that the enormous central pillar was a composite, not made of one tree).
- In Besakana and other houses, there is nothing else on Masoandrotsiroa - is it the oldest original building? I think so, but this needs to be made clearer.
- In Royal tombs, I would try to give some indication of the dates of the tombs to provide context to the reader. It would also help to give the death dates of the named kings in the tombs.
- What is Mahitsy - only used once in the article (now at least)? Reconstruction work on Mahitsy began in 2001 and saw completion in January 2003..
- Error - The original exterior of Manjakamiadana comprised over 70,000 granite stones weighing a total of 700 kilograms. 700 kg is way too little for the total weight. Is it the weight of each stone? Also needs pounds to go with kg.
- Reinstatement seems like the wrong word - reinsertion? Every stone was removed and numbered to facilitate the reinstatement of each one in its original place ...
- Are they rebuilding the Tranovola?
- Caption addition "Location of the Rova of Antananarivo [in Madagascar]"?
- For the images, I would add the date taken if known in the caption (so the lead image is from 2010)
- There are some structure names on the maps that are not discussed in the article that I could see - for example Soamiadanana is not otherwise mentioned.
- Within the article (not counting the gallery) there are a lot of images of the Manjakamiadana, but only one of the tombs. There is a nice color image of the tombs in the gallery - could it be placed in the article itself somewhere?
- Looking at the two maps, the Manjakamiadana was right beside the Fitomiandalana (before it was moved). Since the anjakamiadana was built before the French moved the Fitomiandalana, were they really that close?
- Please make sure that the existing text includes no copyright violations, plagiarism, or close paraphrasing. For more information on this please see Wikipedia:Wikipedia_Signpost/2009-04-13/Dispatches. (This is a general warning given in all peer reviews, in view of previous problems that have risen over copyvios.)
Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 03:47, 15 May 2011 (UTC)