Wikipedia:Peer review/Sakib/archive1

Sakib

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because it needs some grammar and language check, also it needs some improvement.

Thanks, Historyfeelings - talk 07:10, 20 February 2012 (UTC)

Comments

• Reasonable structure to the article, suggest you look at similar FAs to see what level of detail is expected.
• The Karak dab needs to be fixed.
• The link to the name in Arabic shouldn't be a transwiki link, it should be a link to Arabic language followed by the translation.
• A lot of copyediting needs to be done really, I'll point some out but suggest it goes to a good copyeditor as well.
• In general, translate metric units (e.g. 8 km) into Imperial ones (e.g. 8 km (5 mi)).
• A lot of the article is unreferenced, e.g. the "The name" section.
• Per WP:HEAD, that section should just be called "Name" or even better, something like "Etymology"
• Avoid linking very common terms like "water" and "rain" and "mountain" and "valley" for instance.
• Don't link individual dates or years.
• Fix the [citation needed] tag (and provide more citations throughout).
• The various tables and graphs are somewhat messy, if you add more text throughout it might help reduce the clutter.
• Hight should be Height.
• " are: [12] [13] [14]" don't put a space between the colon and the ref, and don't put spaces between refs.
• "maximum temperature Average(°C)" -> "Maximum temperature average (°C)"
• Don't see a need to have the "hide" feature for the table.
• "City is famous for its Olive, fig, Grape and " -> "The city is noted for its olive and fig trees..." no such thing as a Grape tree, avoid capitalising nouns which are not proper nouns.
• Galleries generally avoided, if you expanded the article you could use one or two of these images in the expanded sections.
• References need to be properly formatted, you could use the {{cite web}} template for a consistent look.

The Rambling Man (talk) 13:43, 27 February 2012 (UTC)