Wikipedia:Peer review/School for Creative and Performing Arts/archive1
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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I've considerably expanded the article and would like to receive suggestions on how to improve this article up to GA standards.
Thanks, Vaughanchris (talk) 21:18, 16 December 2009 (UTC)
Comments by doncram First, it seems to me that the article should be moved to "School for Creative and Performing Arts (Cincinnati, Ohio)", to add the disambiguating and clarifying parenthetical phrase. Google search turns up similarly named schools in San Diego and Pittsburgh; the San Diego one uses "of" rather than "for". The current title "School for Creative and Performing Arts" seems like a non-unique name, and it seems possibly a tad Ohio-centric to assert, implicitly, that the use of the preposition "for" is to be understood by the world to mean the Cincinnati school. I notice also that School of Creative and Performing Arts is currently a redirect to this page; it could/should be made into a disambiguation page listing all instead. Or, is this SCPA that famous, nation- or world-wide, that it is really an obvious primary use for the phrase?
Second, the article seems perhaps more detailed than necessary, and perhaps more promotional in tone. For example, that "The college-preparatory curriculum includes language arts, foreign language, mathematics, science, and social studies" seems unsurprising and not different than what most high U.S. high schools cover. That "Advanced Placement courses are available in many of these subjects. The school serves students will all academic needs, including those with special needs." seems to be relevant for a school brochure for prospective students and their parents, but not necessary for a wikipedia article.
I notice one sentence needing clarification: "SCPA has historically been among the highest-scoring public schools, second only to Walnut Hills High School, the selective public college preparatory magnet.[5]" Among the highest-scoring out of what set, schools in Ohio, the nation, the world?
Hope these quick comments are helpful. doncram (talk) 22:04, 22 December 2009 (UTC)
- Addendum: Actually maybe the school is that famous, and should stay at the current article title. I am just not familiar with it. Also, i did start a disambiguation page at School of Creative and Performing Arts.
- I wonder about another claim, that this is "the first and only school to combine a full range of arts studies with a rigorous academic program for elementary through high school". The only school in the world? I am sure that depends on how you define "a full range" and "rigorous". I'd be more comfortable if a broad claim like that was presented as a quotation from a source. If it's the school's own assertion, it can still be given, but it should be identified clearly as being their own claim. doncram (talk) 22:27, 22 December 2009 (UTC)
- Further about the disambiguation issues, i developed the disambiguation page further and just found School for the Creative and Performing Arts about a Kentucky school, whose wikipedia article started in 2006. I note a discussion section at the Cleveland school's talk page on the issue, previously, too. I'll open a requested move about renaming both of these two school wikipedia pages, to address that. About other matters in this article, perhaps someone else will give more comments. I may not comment further myself, esp. in the absence of some response about my comments so far though. doncram (talk) 11:14, 23 December 2009 (UTC)
- Thank you for your review and comments. I've made additional edits per your suggestions, and I agree they improve the article. Regarding the renaming question, I think it is a valid discussion and I have commented on the talk page. Vaughanchris (talk) 16:55, 24 December 2009 (UTC)