Wikipedia:Peer review/Stark Raving Dad/archive1

Stark Raving Dad

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I think that this article has Featured Article potential. The article is properly sourced, well written and formated. Based on what I've seen from other FA television episodes (South Park episodes for example) I think that "Stark Raving Dad" meets the FA criteria. Before I even come close to nominating this article for FA I'd like to do a peer review so other editors could give suggestions on how to help the article, etc. If any editors could led their suggestions and/or opinions, I'd very much appreciate it. Thanks, Crystal Clear x3 [talk] 11:29, 8 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

The third passage in the lead doesn't really properly summarize the incident it's relating. It sort of leaves the reader hanging. What's more, if that little factoid warrants inclusion in the episode summary, why not the info about the tribute airing following Jackson's passing? (personally, I don't think the lead would suffer from it's removal, but it might work in a more robust state)

Done I added mention of the episode re-airing in the third paragraph in the articles lead. Crystal Clear x3 [talk] 21:56, 13 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I disagree with adding mention of the re-airing of the episode in 2009. The alternate opening has received a tonne of coverage over the years, and is a lot more notable than the 2009 tribute. Sure, the tribute also received coverage, but not as much and not over as long of a timeframe. -- Scorpion ⁰⁴²² 22:12, 13 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]

The Production section - in particular, the second passage of the Production section - reads like a list that has been lumped together. In other words, it's just several short sentences, one after the other, that really takes the reader out of the experience. Definitely needs some transitions and polish.

I think the article is close. It certainly contains a lot of valuable and interesting content and seems to be well-sourced and properly structured. Overall, I'd say the contributors have done a fantastic job in assembling the critical elements. Now it just needs polish. Polish polish polish. Having seen the episode so long ago, examining the article was unexpectedly reminiscent. Keep up the good work!
--K10wnsta (talk) 20:41, 13 March 2010 (UTC)[reply]