Wikipedia:Peer review/Tomislav Vlasic/archive1

Tomislav Vlasic

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I'm unsure if the sources are reliable and if the article is up to snuff with Wikipedia guidelines.

Thanks, Oct13 (talk) 08:23, 5 April 2012 (UTC)

Comments - not sure what you're trying to achieve, e.g. GA, but will review with that (sort of) in mind:

• Four dab links, "visionaries", "cardinals", "association", "manipulation".
• What does OFM mean?
• Is there a suitable infobox you could use e.g. {{Infobox person}}?
• The lead is a little short, it should adequately summarise the whole article.
• Anything about his life before entering the priesthood?
• "he sent her to Germany and " try to refrain from linking common words and major geographical regions (in this case, Germany doesn't need to be linked).
• "a personal friend of his" of whom? the landlord of Vlasic?
• Medjugorje section needs references.
• "Vlašić left Vitina in 1987 to go to northern Italy with German laywoman Agnes Heupel, to found, with the help of the visionary Marija Pavlovic,[4] a mixed-sex association inspired by the apparitions of Medjugorje, with the name Kraljice mira, potpuno smo tvoji. Po Mariji k Isusu ("Queen of Peace, we are all yours: to Jesus through Mary")." a very long sentence!! Split it up a bit.
• "In 2009, the Congregation laicized Vlašić at his own request and forbade him to make any public statements on religious matters." needs ref and "forbade him from making any public statements" would sound better to me.
• "a video[6] about Central Nucleus," move the ref to after the comma.
• All online references should have a publisher, preferably an accessdate and publication date.
• Could probably find another category as a person from Yugoslavia.

The Rambling Man (talk) 10:19, 11 April 2012 (UTC)