Wikipedia:Peer review/Washburn High School/archive1

Washburn High School

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A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for June 2008.

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because of all the work I've done to it and I'd like to see what others thought of the article and what can be improved. I know the history section needs updating and I will be doing that shortly, but until then, please comment on the article as a whole or any piece you'd like.

Thanks, Calebrw (talk) 18:30, 14 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from ~ Eóin (talk)
I really like how this article has progressed. I hope you are planning to make this a Good article. I've found it's helpful to look at Category:GA-Class school articles for some examples of other articles. Here are some comments:

The lead section could use expanding to at least two paragraphs. Look at Wikipedia:Lead section for advice.
Be careful when you discuss graduation rates as they can vary wildly depending on how they are calculated. This from the MNDOE show that Washburn's rate can vary from 89.9 to 49.6. So when comparisons are made make sure the same calculation is used.

*Is the newspaper's name the The Ghrist or the The Grist?

- Fixed. The Grist. — Calebrw (talk) 23:21, 16 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

*Categories like "High schools in Minnesota" or "High schools in the United States" don't need to be included because "High schools in Minneapolis" is a sub-cat of them. See Wikipedia:Categorization#Some general guidelines #3 for the guideline.

- Fixed. — Calebrw (talk) 23:21, 16 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]
The "Extracurricular activities" section could use info about academic or interest oriented clubs.
I seem to remember the school being officially or accidentally named after William D. Washburn but is conventionally named after Cadwallader C. Washburn. Seems kind of odd to name a school after a guy who never lived in the same state.

* Does the tunnel run under the stadium?

- Fixed. Yes, it does. — Calebrw (talk) 23:21, 16 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Try to avoid one sentence sections like "Bilingual support". Try merging them to other parts of the article.
The "Fresh Start" section is very good but I don't feel like I know why Washburn was selected. Was it an enforced No Child Left Behind measure or a proactive approach?
As you noted the History section could use some work.
The referencing is great, keep it up.
I've got free access to the archives of the Star Tribune and the Pioneer Press. If you ever want an article just tell me and I can email it to you. I've relied on the old stories heavily for articles like Minneapolis North and Arlington Senior High School.

That's it for now. You've done a fantastic job so far, I hope you keep working on it. ~ Eóin (talk) 03:55, 16 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I've taken a stab at the history section, it could use some tinkering and extra work. I noticed Washburn has a good number of state championships [1]. Most schools articles list them. There are a couple of ways to do it. For example: separated into sports like Roswell High School, in a large table like Bloomington Kennedy , or just listed like Minneapolis North. ~ Eóin (talk) 02:08, 19 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]